Monday, December 7, 2015

Wellness Update-Medications

I say my psychiatrist on Friday and, you guessed it, more medication changes! I'm weary but still a tad hopeful that things will be better with new meds, so here we go again.

There is a long term plan to get me to just Lamictal and Lexapro, and then maybe just Lamictal. To get there, I am currently tapering off Risperidone and will be off it around the 18th. At the same time I am tapering up on Lamictal; the lowest dose for two weeks and then double for two weeks and so on, I won't be up to the dose she's aiming for for at least 5 weeks I think she said. Sometime in there we're gonna be tapering off Lithium as well. It seems like I just don't tolerate it very well what with the blurred vision spells and cotton brain from time to time and the shakes, so I'll be glad to have all that go away. She thinks the Risperidone is causing my constipation issues so I'm hoping that goes away as well!

So, lots of changes. I hope that this drug does something for me. I'm generally not a "druggie" person and like to avoid medication when possible, so having some not work just makes me believe even less in the power of pharmaceuticals and want to stop experimenting altogether. I'm not sure what happily medicated looks or feels like, but these drugs have to work for somebody.... right?

In other news, I've been struggling with anxiety and been resisting taking Klonopin for it. I took one last night and this morning and it did seem to help, so I think I need to get over my anti-drug-ness and just medicate already. Saturday morning I was so nauseated from anxiety I thought I was gonna ralph! And we all know I've had enough of that...

On top of all these pills I've been trying to get back into my supplement regime as an effort to work on my self esteem and feel better about my health overall. I know not taking my vitamin D is a bad, bad thing for me! I don't need any more depressive factors in my life! It's difficult to keep up with the supplements, especially since I need to eat or I'll get sick from them and I don't like eating lately.

Well. There's a chunk of my life lately. The pilly, confusing, frustrating part.

OH! Bonus, my thyroid is back in check and we're just tweaking things, so that's a relief at least. Still have to do labs pretty frequently but I'll take a needle over crazy ass thyroid levels any day ;)

11 comments:

  1. Hooray for having your thyroid under control.
    Fingers and toes crossed on the other medication fronts. I am not a fan either but have a life-time regime now. Sigh. Except that it is better than the alternative.

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    1. Your words "lifetime regime" made me think of when they toppled Saddam's statue! Boy. The things we go through, must go through. I'm glad you've found something that works at least :)

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  2. Really hoping that your medication gets sorted out and you start to feel like you. It can take such a long time and it can be so discouraging. I am going to burn my Winter Solstice box again this year and I am going to put in a wish that you start to feel better. I have never put a wish in for someone else before but you are one of the best blogging buddies ever and deserve this. xo

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    1. Oh Birdie, thank you so much for the honor! I am interested to hear more about your Winter Solstice box, I do not remember this from blogging years past. You are an amazing blogging buddy too and I hope you feel better ASAP too <3

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  3. That is great news about your thyroid! And hopefully you get the right medications working for you. I love how optimistic you are. And you are. You're always put one foot in front of the other even though it's so damn difficult some days. I admire you!

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    1. Thanks Martha :) It is good news and I am trying to stay hopeful, baby steps is right!

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  4. Dear Hannah, I am truly hoping that your meds work for you, I am going through similar as well, just saw my doctor today and he made an adjustment to my meds as well and wants to see me back in a month.

    Love and hugs to you, dear friend.

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    1. Thanks Linda. I hope we both find our right doses and medications soon!

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  5. Good about the thyroid but I'm here catching up and reading, and it sounds like you're in deeper hole, with the negative thoughts toward the baby. Very sorry you have to feel these things. Hoping you can find the proper support.

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    1. I hope so, but I feel paralyzed and unable to drum up the type of support I need. Not sure what I will do but I'm doing what I can day to day and trying to avoid beating myself up or calling myself failure

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    2. First, you are NOT a failure. You're healing and getting stronger and using writing to help you. You are NOT a failure, not even by a long shot.

      As for the rest, you'll get there. Healing takes time and you're going off meds and finding new ways to make things work. Give yourself the time to heal.

      You are worth it.

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Thank you for reading and commenting!

Be well, HBF