Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Why does crap travel in a herd?

Bad day.

Diaper in the laundry machine.

Fucked up baking my brother's birthday cake.

Baby Bananaface won't nap and is escaping the crib.

And I'm feeling so worn out from trying to keep another episode at bay.

I'm so disappointed at how much progress I've lost, how destabilized I've become.

I know it's been rough lately. Now I'm feeling like I'm lost again.

Guess I'll be going for a drive to try and get BB down.

One step at a time.

I've been here before.

I'll be here again.

I'll get through this.

One step at a time.

One step at a time.


7 comments:

  1. Hugs to you and your precious boy and Happy Birthday to your brother...you'll get through this!

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  2. Yes, one step at a time! And here are some {{{{{hugs}}}}}

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  3. One step at a time indeed. And some days marking time is progress too. Heartfelt hugs and oceans of caring.

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  4. I don't think you're slipping because you know just what to tell yourself to help you get by. Sometimes regular life is hard.

    It sounds like you had a really bad day, but I also had images of a really good plot for a sitcom. You are such a good writer, you could write about your day with a comedic twist. I'd like to read that.

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  5. Diaper in the washer, I really cringed reading that. Hope that was sorted out with minimal mess.

    Baking is hard. It's more chemistry than cooking and thus very easy to screw up. I know professionals who screw up all the time. Another cake can always be baked.

    If you weren't worn out 80% of the time while caring for a small child, I would be very suspicious of you. Like maybe you're a droid/alien/fairy in disguise. Mum used to dope us up on children's nyquil to get us to sleep....

    You are allowed to feel stressed and worn out and at the end of your rope. I don't think that means you have lost progress.

    Sending prayers your way<3

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  6. This journey is not linear. It's all over the place, gleaning bits and pieces here and there. Learning. Forgetting. Relearning. Good days. Shit days. Shittier days. You really have nt lost any progress, it's just a bad day and bad circumstances and fatigue that make you think that. You do know that Depression is a liar.
    Hang in there. And I mean that in the most un-trite way possible.

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Thank you for reading and commenting!

Be well, HBF