Hubster got laid off.
Handled it pretty well day-of and stumbling a bit now. I think that's reasonable and I'm trying to stay calm and work through it.
Friday, October 27, 2017
Saturday, October 21, 2017
A Few Things
A) Had a happy anniversary yesterday. There were certainly some "aaagh!" moments (read: potty training & toddler parenting & WTF is a potato doin' tasting like that) and overall it was a good day.
I got the chores done that I wanted to and when the hubs came home I felt like I had "made the home" for him. I had on a dress I know he likes and he walked in with a big smile and a nearly-as-big bouquet for me.
We had special steak from the butcher and after dinner we went to Freddy's and checked Baby Bananaface into the childcare for what we hope would be nearly an hour of "us" time strolling about the store with some java.
Well. We've been potty training, as I mentioned, and BB started dropping the "potty" word. We got paged. I went through the trouble of taking him to the bathroom and stripping down his bottom half to get him on the toilet. He just ran around bare-assed, giggling and evading the pants in my hands.
Yuck-y. Washed those socks right when we got home. *facepalm*
Ended the evening wrapped in fuzzy throws on the couch watching some "Forged in Fire" and mumbling on in pleasant, exhausted conversation littered with tangents...
B) Let the record show:
I can't remember exactly what I was "right" about.... that's not as important as the hubster's words immortalized on video! (Hoping it plays right... me/technology/ack)
C) I know we got some fellow word nerds around here and I'm wondering what the thoughts and feels are about this bit of internet discussion:
It's apart of economic bulimia, society binges on all of the latest and greatest trends, resulting in a purge into landfills. So they can consume again ostentatiously trying to manifest some artificial semblance of happiness.
Some of the word choices perked my eyebrow. I agree with the gist, there's just something about the delivery that scrunches my brow. Thoughts?
I got the chores done that I wanted to and when the hubs came home I felt like I had "made the home" for him. I had on a dress I know he likes and he walked in with a big smile and a nearly-as-big bouquet for me.
 |
| Roses-but-not-roses per my usual taste ;o) |
Well. We've been potty training, as I mentioned, and BB started dropping the "potty" word. We got paged. I went through the trouble of taking him to the bathroom and stripping down his bottom half to get him on the toilet. He just ran around bare-assed, giggling and evading the pants in my hands.
Yuck-y. Washed those socks right when we got home. *facepalm*
Ended the evening wrapped in fuzzy throws on the couch watching some "Forged in Fire" and mumbling on in pleasant, exhausted conversation littered with tangents...
B) Let the record show:
I can't remember exactly what I was "right" about.... that's not as important as the hubster's words immortalized on video! (Hoping it plays right... me/technology/ack)
C) I know we got some fellow word nerds around here and I'm wondering what the thoughts and feels are about this bit of internet discussion:
It's apart of economic bulimia, society binges on all of the latest and greatest trends, resulting in a purge into landfills. So they can consume again ostentatiously trying to manifest some artificial semblance of happiness.
Some of the word choices perked my eyebrow. I agree with the gist, there's just something about the delivery that scrunches my brow. Thoughts?
Sunday, October 15, 2017
Some pics
Reminded me of a cherished fellow blogress:
"Black Dog" stood out to me so starkly!
The hubs found me napping and apparently I dragged some undies over my eyes for a blindfold instead of hitting the lights. Thankfully, they were clean.
The Univerae shamed me for my Frappucino indulgence!
Wednesday, October 11, 2017
Monday, October 9, 2017
Going, going, going
Stealing a few moments for a quick update.
Overall move has gone smoothly, although I did have a dip Friday night. Started having hopeless thoughts and flashes of suicidal ideation. At nighttime I was so upset that I couldn't sleep in our bed, so I took my Lunesta and my Ativan and laid on the couch with my girls. The hubster came out in the middle of the night sometime and carried me back to bed.
I'm still feeling unstable and struggling between forging ahead and slowing down to try and right myself. The past couple weeks I took it slow at CrossFit and while it helped my TOS symptoms a bit, I don't think it did me any favors in regard to mood.
I don't know. And the holidays coming up. I just. Ugh. One day at a time.
Side note, I had a nasty nightmare last night that involved my dad putting a hit out on me. I was fleeing the hit men and found my mother in a library (yeah, no clue there). I tried to explain the situation and ask for help and she acted clueless and dismissed me. Part of me felt like she was just, um, whatchya call it, "plausible deniability?"
Anyways. Ended up getting help from a stranger with a big boat. It was in a field. On a trailer. Somehow we started it up and drove off... on land. On a trailer. No clue. I do recall that we pulled down cheap window covers so the sharpshooters couldn't see in, so we were driving blind.
Lots of symbolism there. I have said to the hubby multiple times how it felt like my parents didn't care if I lived or died. Felt like they were killing me while we lived with them... brought back memories from growing up. With my skewed perception sometimes I would see it as a type of neglect and other times it seemed more intentional.
Hurtful either way.
Baby Bananaface has been doing pretty well adjusting. Much more hard on me getting used to being with him all day! I am planning on creating a concrete schedule to help us both, chore time included.
On top of all this I am trying to keep pace on my online course for the public speaking credit. The plan is to wrap it up and start my MA in November. At this point, I am considering December. Still need to get financial aid going and I'm worried about stabilizing... TBD
Sad that I haven't been able to keep up with everyone's blogs. I will try to read soon and catch up. In the meantime though, I have chores to finish, my hair to do, and an afternoon at the pumpkin patch to prepare for (cue the mud and booger smears).
Thinking of y'all and hoping you are well :o)
Overall move has gone smoothly, although I did have a dip Friday night. Started having hopeless thoughts and flashes of suicidal ideation. At nighttime I was so upset that I couldn't sleep in our bed, so I took my Lunesta and my Ativan and laid on the couch with my girls. The hubster came out in the middle of the night sometime and carried me back to bed.
I'm still feeling unstable and struggling between forging ahead and slowing down to try and right myself. The past couple weeks I took it slow at CrossFit and while it helped my TOS symptoms a bit, I don't think it did me any favors in regard to mood.
I don't know. And the holidays coming up. I just. Ugh. One day at a time.
Side note, I had a nasty nightmare last night that involved my dad putting a hit out on me. I was fleeing the hit men and found my mother in a library (yeah, no clue there). I tried to explain the situation and ask for help and she acted clueless and dismissed me. Part of me felt like she was just, um, whatchya call it, "plausible deniability?"
Anyways. Ended up getting help from a stranger with a big boat. It was in a field. On a trailer. Somehow we started it up and drove off... on land. On a trailer. No clue. I do recall that we pulled down cheap window covers so the sharpshooters couldn't see in, so we were driving blind.
Lots of symbolism there. I have said to the hubby multiple times how it felt like my parents didn't care if I lived or died. Felt like they were killing me while we lived with them... brought back memories from growing up. With my skewed perception sometimes I would see it as a type of neglect and other times it seemed more intentional.
Hurtful either way.
Baby Bananaface has been doing pretty well adjusting. Much more hard on me getting used to being with him all day! I am planning on creating a concrete schedule to help us both, chore time included.
On top of all this I am trying to keep pace on my online course for the public speaking credit. The plan is to wrap it up and start my MA in November. At this point, I am considering December. Still need to get financial aid going and I'm worried about stabilizing... TBD
Sad that I haven't been able to keep up with everyone's blogs. I will try to read soon and catch up. In the meantime though, I have chores to finish, my hair to do, and an afternoon at the pumpkin patch to prepare for (cue the mud and booger smears).
Thinking of y'all and hoping you are well :o)
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