So my sister called via FaceTime last night. Apparently she had had dinner with our mother and had to tell me some stuff that they talked about.
There is a long-standing feud between my sister and an old family friend named Sue. She and my mother used to be good friends until something went down with my sister. So my sister tells me last night that when she and Sue's daughter were going to the same college, my sister had a panic attack. Apparently Sue took that as my sister being suicidal and told "everyone" so that when my sister came back to work in our home town everything "thought I was crazy."
First, I have multiple editions of this story and it seems to change a little bit each time. So I'm confused about that. Second, I had never heard this version before so it grabbed my attention.
She went on to say that she wanted to clear the air with Sue and talk about it but Sue became... aggressive? She told me that Sue said that my sister was a "manipulative bitch" and that she told my sister that she was "going to end up crazy and useless like your sister."
Mind you, this is the Sue that I lived with when I met my husband. This is the Sue that asked to see me before we left for Utah. This is the Sue that attended our private wedding ceremony. It's so confusing...
The hubs has no qualms about saying that my sister is simply lying or making things up to add to the truth.
She went on about something between the hubs and I and my mother. The story went that when my sister got pregnant right after BB was born that she became a trigger for me. That part is right. I just didn't know that she was so aware of it.
There was a family event that she said she wasn't going to but I was. Apparently at the last minute she changed her mind and we weren't told. According to the story it triggered me and after the event we supposedly sent a horrible email to my mother about how she didn't warn us and we didn't want her in our lives anymore and didn't want her around BB.
We searched both our emails and could find no such message.
Once again, the hubs thinks she's making things up. That she's jealous right now or not feeling well and wanting to make me feel bad so she's making things up.
I can't conceive of it. Who would do such a thing? How could that be? He is so confident though.
What gets me is that she said, "I'm only telling you this now because you're super stable."
Why tell me at all if there aren't ulterior motives? What is her motive? Is this a symptom of our Freudian culture of digging things up and talking them to death? It definitely goes against my DBT training of acceptance and nonjudgment and letting go. Although addressing it directly with DBT skills is possible.
The hubs is confident we will simply forget about this and move on. Things with my mother are good (or so we thought) and there is no reason to upset the apple cart.
But it's frustrating and bewildering. With my memory.... it complicates things. I can't remember my sister at her worst. I know I've written here extensively about it though. I can't imagine why she would do this.
Anyways. End of school is getting utterly boring. I finalized grades so I have nothing to do. My seniors have events and graduation next week so I'll be sitting around all day doing nothing except maybe watching a few kids during study hall. I have brought in sudoku, word searches, and a good book to combat the boredom but it's hard filling an ENTIRE DAY like I had to do Friday.
Weather her is still a bit volatile but warming up and the garden is doing well. I hope things will GROW and look full but it takes time. Thankfully most of our plants are perennials and we should get to see them expand over time. Well, that depends on how long we're here... the hubs wants to save up and get a house next spring but I'm not so motivated. I like it here. If we can't buy this house I'd be unwilling to move outside our neighborhood. Most of the houses are old and need fixing in some ways, so wouldn't we want to save up a down payment and some fixin' money?
So this turned out longer than I expected and hopefully makes sense. I'm willing to answer any questions!
Love and hugs. :o)