saturday night blah post from my smart phone

today started out blah and is slowing down at a teary blah. i have been grouchy at the fiance all day and even though i was super excited for a girls night out with the bff and her college buddies now that its over i feel more lonely than i did before going. im not excited about the wedding especially since we have four months left and still dont have a photographer or officiant booked. im sick of having my hopes dashed by those i delegate to and im sick of playing the superhero and swooping in to fix everything. if it its sucky oh well i dont care anymore. right now i just feel like the guest of honor at a poopy party and everything is just shitty. yeah thats probably the depression talking but it basically what im thinking. life as an unemployed twenty something is pretty shittastic at the moment. you dont see this stage in life advertised in barbie commercials...