Woke up this morning in a much different mindset-it wasn't the darkness greeting me, it was my right mind and DBT skills and mindfulness! The dark thoughts have been whispering but I've been able to brush them off and so far it's been a good day. Still early, but I'm hoping this upward trend continues.
Oddly there is part of me that feels a little disappointed that the darkness didn't deepen or continue-I feel like a liar or a faker or something. In reality, it's the disease and it's unpredictable and while I can utilize skills and treatment and therapy I can't really control the way this disease presents itself. So, I will just ride this ride and do my best and see what happens. Leave judgment at the door, we don't need it here!
Thank you all for your concern and support. I really appreciated seeing all those comments and drop-ins and will continue to keep y'all updated as I see where my mood goes.